Time

I don’t know why but I always love to start my writings with a “Well…” for the first word. Maybe because I always think of making a writing’s like answering a question or so.

I do find that nowadays, in this such a life that we’re living in, having a time for only yourself are hard to find. I think that we’re currently being in such a rush for something that we actually clueless about. We stuck on the moment where every place that we step in, bunch of people are there. Funny part is, lots of them care too much, not about their on business, but about others business.

Lots of time I meet this kind of people who thinks that having a time for ourselves are stupid. They think that its such a waste of time. I see that being in a good relationship with other people are good. Really good if I may say. But don’t you guys ever feel sick of being stuck there in a conversation we really try to build while what inside it is actually trashy?

i am the kind of person who really love to make friends, hanging out, having this discussion, to stuck in a busy time is heaven for me. but there always this time when I feel that I really need my time alone. This time when I think that I cant take it if people disagree with me. the time when I think they have more that hundreds masks just to cover their fake faces. This time when I think, “Gosh! I need to take a one day break out of my life, and come back when the world goes just like what I want.”

Don’t you ever feel that. The uncomfortable feeling you get when you’re in middle of a crowd when suddenly you can hear almost EVERYTHING that speaks or sounds at that moment? The moment when you can pause the time, and all you want to do is lock these people’s mouth, unpause it and scream at them “LISTEN TO ME!”.

Those moment, my friend, are the moment where I think I need my time alone. My time having a cup of coffee, stacks of good books to read and music plays for the backsound. My time sitting on a one peaceful beach, nothing to hear but the sound of the waves, nothing moves but your hair pushed by the wind. My time sitting there somewhere when I can see stars. My time when I can think of my world, my life, my words and write it down or speak it or scream it.

Human need those time. If only each one of us have this time for theirself alone, just one day a month, I have a feeling that we don’t need to blame on each other’s mistakes. We don’t need to fight, oh god no!

We have close the communication we have to ourself. We prefer to have a communication with other people instead of our own self. That’s why some people don’t believe on theirself. That’s why somepeople scared. Because they never speak to their soul, while their soul have too much awesome secrets about themselves waiting to be spit. They’re inside, waiting out brain to greet them and ask em for a date. J

Change

It called life if there’s some transformation happened or things changed. Well, at least for me. As when things changed means things move. When things move they make some invisible chains that connected each event to the other events. Or in a simple way, action reaction. Well, at least, for me.

People changed. Feelings changed. Even a mindset can change. It isn’t a new thing. And when they changed, some may like it, some may not. As in changing we either become better, or worse. But it also depends on the who sees it.

I experience this lots of time, and also now. Being on the first year of college, means saying, and “See you” to the high school friends. And when we met, we started to recognize some things changed in each of us. Physically or emotionally. Not a surprise.

Each one of us stepped to a new place. We start to try to fit in the new place. Some succeeded, some…well…still trying to, and some gave up. Each one of them (who succeeded, still trying and gave up) have their own way to react to the event. Some may become popular, some become too shy, some become too excited, some become a complete stranger. But there’re some who still stay the same.

Which means not all of us change. And for those who doesn’t change, well, it may be good it may be bad. As in good, they can control them self to not follow the stream. As in bad, well, people need to grow.

I myself like change. It always surprises me in such a surprising way. I have this friend on my high school. He, well, lets just say that he loves to sleep and didn’t like biology, physics, and chemistry that much. But he had this one dream to enter the medical major on college. Short story, he did make it to the medical major on college. And things changed, he study day and night. When I talk to him every time we met he always put some medical terms on our conversation. Surprise!

I changed. I entered art major, and things changed. Especially for my mom. Just say that she doesn’t into art, that much or even at all. But I like the fact that I changed. I see things differently, I met bunch of people who gave me their thoughts. But still, I try not to change too much.

Change. But not too much, not too little. Just enough. Enough to let people recognize that you change. Enough to let people recognize that you’re still the person that they know and they like. Just enough to help you grow.